I go away for one day...

and the world goes to pot.  I left the house yesterday at 4:30am for a 7:00am flight to Brisbane and when I finish my days work up there and am looking forward for a long but peaceful trip home, I see a) Kim Beazley and Wilson Tuckey dukeing it out on the steps of Parliament House and that 21 planes were intended to be blown up out of London (they showed this on the in flight news… interesting…).  Well relax peeps, I am here on the trains once again and made it out of BrisVegas in one piece… just mind you, that place is one strange town if their cabbies are anything to go by.  The cabbie I got to the airport was perhaps the weirdest individual capable (??) of driving a motor vehicle I have ever met.

Getting into his cab, he was abused by some rough looking bloke on the footpath for reasons I cant fathom still and he proceeded to stick his head out of his window with a tirade of “f#cken c#nt” and other niceties.  Once we were off, he talked at a million miles an hour about drugs, his son, his son smokes marijuana, how QLD Premier Beattie wants them to drink they’re own sewerage (this is true, he’s not making it up) and that Terrorists are everywhere and that we should stop people travelling and we should make some sort of national light rail thing to get more cars off the road and avoid road fatalities…. and… lots of other stuff.  I spent the whole 20min trip “uh huh, yep” to avoid any form of confrontation and besides that’s all I had the chance to say between his nutty chatter and his expletives at other motorists.

Then I had a lovely flight back with 40-50 under 12 year old Japanese school kids on some foreign excursion.  It was pure comedy watching the stewards/es trying to control all these kids, who were seemingly without guardians, who refused to sit down in their correct seats, treated the plane like a school bus and ran up and down the aisles whilst “light refreshments” were being served.  Given that the kids didn’t speak English, and the stewards couldn’t speak Japanese, it was hilarious.  At one point a gay steward in a camp voice says “Do you speak Cantonese?  I speak a bit of Cantonese.” and the kids looked at him blankly as he said something in his alleged Cantonese.  The stewardess with him quietly says, “They’re Japanese not Chinese” and he says “Well they all look the same to me!”.

Hasn’t John Howard and Pauline Hanson done wonders for this country… God Bless Us All!